6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom

6 Weird Things That Show Up In Every Sitcom

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom

As the years pile on, all sitcoms will start to will vary depending on old tropes and recycled plots. Whether it’s the clip reveal, the very special episode, or a terrible spoof of Cyrano de Bergerac , we maintain considering the same things over and over again, and will almost certainly continue to do so until the Earth falls into the sun. But sometimes the repetitions are so bizarrely specific that we can’t assistance but wonder if something else going on here here …

6

Santa Is A Real, Magical Being … And No One Discovers That Amazing

An absurd number of otherwise-straightforward sitcoms have Christmas episodes wherein Santa Claus uncovers himself to be unambiguously real. And yet instead of rewriting everything these characters know about reality, they seem to accept it as an everyday part of life. They are perfectly comfy living in a world where no one chuckles at gags, romantic tension between friends lasts for years, and magic is perfectly a thing.

5

Cars Crash Into Houses All The Damn Time

In an episode of Full House from March 1990, Stephanie decides to drive Joey’s car without his permission. In a wacky mix-up that “manufacturers ” could have never predicted, she misstep the “R” on the gearshift for the radio and backs the thing straight into the kitchen.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television “Let’s have Joey come in and say, ‘YOU CAN’T PARK THAT HERE! ‘” “I like that, but maybe instead Danny enters calling, ‘WHAT THE- WHAT IS THIS! Fuck! FUCK !!! YOU STUPID GODDAMN KID! ‘” — Full House Writers Room, 1990

In an episode of Family Matters from later that same year, Eddie( who apparently didn’t watch the TGIF show right before his) also drives a auto against his parents’ hopes, and does it straight into a house.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television “Let’s maybe have Urkel say, ‘YOU CAN’T PARK THAT HERE! ‘” “That’s good! I had the note Carl enters with gun depict, firing six rounds into the windshield, hollering, ‘I’LL KILL YOU, MOTHERFUCK- wait, EDDIE !? ‘ ” — Family Matters Writers Room, 1990

But driving a auto into your own home is a sitcom tradition going back decades. In an episode of the ‘8 0s depict Silver Spoons , Ricky Schroeder’s grandfather crashes the car into the house.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Sony Pictures Television “Let’s have Kate say, ‘Wha- wha !? You can’t park that in here! ‘” “What if instead she only dies? Dies from shock right there on the floor? Because life is nothing? All life is nothing? Ha ha, yeah. — Silver Spoons Writers Room, 1982

Marie manages to get the entire damn vehicle into the house on Everybody Loves Raymond , which inspires a discussion about whether old people should still be driving. These people manage to turn the tiniest misunderstanding into 22 minutes of awkward hijinks, but they live in a world in which everyone they know gets killed by a speeding automobile while watching TV in their own home.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom CBS Television “They have a cook sale? He gets a task as a Sherpa? I … I’m out of ideas.” “Me too. Let’s check to see if anyone’s driven a automobile into the house yet.” “Yeah! And then one of them runs, ‘YOU CAN’T PARK THAT HERE! ‘” “Ha ha ha ha ha ha! — Everybody Loves Raymond Writers Room, 1996

Something about a laugh track seems to attract vehicular manslaughter, because it happened again in The Suite Life Of Zack And Cody , when London drives into a building.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Walt Disney Television “I want to die. Kill me.” “We do it together. On three. One. Two.” * BANG * — The Suite Life Of Zack And Cody Writers Room, 2005

This doesn’t merely happen when a stupid kid or an elderly idiot get behind the wheel. Sometimes sitcom characters do it on purpose, like this jealous lover in the ‘9 0s demonstrate Wings .

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom CBS Television “You can’t park that here? ” “Fine.” — Wings Writers Room, 1990

And another jealous devotee in Two And A Half Men .

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television “How !? What !? Where are we !? ” “The question isn’t where. It’s WHEN.” — Two And A Half Men Writers Room, 28,000 B.C.

There are many questions here, several about creative insolvency, but most pressing is: How fast does someone have to be driving to crash a auto THROUGH a home? The answer, as any Mythbuster will tell you, is “any speed, so long as it’s a plot point.”

4

Basically Every ‘9 0s Black Sitcom Had A Pool Hustling Episode

Of all the weirdly specific things to happen multiple times across multiple sitcoms, this might be the weirdest and most specific. The first time it happened was in a 1990 episode of Family Matters , when Eddie Winslow beats his friend at pond and get cocky. He takes that cockiness to a local pool hall, where he promptly get hustled out of $250 by a Texan named Boyd Higgins. Urkel then tries to win the money back, but Urkel is only magically good at chess, science, basketball, poker, and bowling. He sucks at pool. Luckily, Carl shows up, and it so happens that while this was never, ever mentioned before, he is in fact a world-class pool player. He sinks shoot after shot, then turns the cue over to the family’s grandma, who reaches a quadruple bank shoot to win the money back. The children and the hustler learn a valuable lesson about … how the last person to hustle person in a chain of hustles is the good guy?

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television “I sharked a kid.”

In an episode of The Fresh Prince Of Bel Air that aired THREE MONTHS LATER, Will drives Uncle Phil’s Benz to a seedy pool hall, where he proceeds to crush a bunch of locals and become hilariously cocky. He then goes down $300 against a local hustler named Charlie Mack, and has to put up his uncle’s vehicle for collateral. Uncle Phil then shows up and turns out to be … hold on a second … a world-class pond player? He sinks trick shooting after trick shooting and wins back the money( plus $ 600 ), teaching the children and the hustler a lesson: The good guy is the hustler who’s holding the money when the credits roll.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television “That’s why they call me Bel-Air Fats.”

Half a decade subsequently, in a 1996 episode of The Steve Harvey Show , a kid named Bullethead crushes some locals and gets lesson-learning cocky. He objective up losing the school’s field trip money to two hustlers named Raven and Jody. This inspires Steve Harvey and Cedric the Entertainer to win back the money by dressing in African garb and pretending to be clueless Rwandan tribesmen who have never heard of pool. They win all the money back with a montage of trick shots and teach the same lesson: Only gamble against people who are worse than you at pool.

In 1995, there were episodes of Martin AND Living Single in which the main characters get hustled at pool halls. Queen Latifah’s sudden pond abilities win back all the money in Living Single , but of all the wacky characters Martin knows , none of them are secretly world-class pool players. This was likely because his wig kept falling off when he played, and not because of a choice made by the writers. Still, it led to this being the only black sitcom of the ‘9 0s wherein a character lost his or her money to a pond shark without winning it back via magically luck circumstances. And so Martin remains, as ever, an unimpeachable bastion of realism.

3

There Are An Awful Lot Of Monkeys In Sitcom Worlds

Sitcom cosmoes operate according to their own internal logic, but they overlap on one specific gag: Monkeys will be a part of your family or friend group at some point in their own lives. Which is odd, because monkeys are not really a fixture of the urban American scenery. In fact, in 19 countries, it’s not even legal to own a monkey unless you’re a zoo. Which makes a lot of sitcom tales not only stupid, but also state monkey crimes .

Monkey plots in sitcoms fall into a few cases categories. One classic is the monkey-from-the-zoo episode, like the time Kramer has to apologize to one on Seinfeld .

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Sony Pictures Television “I’m sorry, Jerry! I didn’t know Santa Claus was real when I constructed that wish! “

On Full House , they somehow end up bringing a chimpanzee home, which is cute, but also the reason we don’t call them the Olsen Triplets anymore.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television “Drop in to consider the Tanners run BANANAS, Tuesdays at 8: 30! My face! IT TOOK MY FACE.”

The zoo conceit runs because it dedicates the show an air of plausibility. Zoos exist in cities, so it’s sort of possible that the animals might have to be temporarily placed into the homes of non-zookeepers with unpredictable, fragile children. But what’s really strange is how often we see sitcom characters straight up get a monkey as a pet. Monkeys are not great pets. They poop, throw turd, and screech maniacally as they tear out your eyes, which is why New York utterly doesn’t allow them as pets. Yet there are Ross, palling around with little Marcel.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television State crime? More like great time! Ross and Friends are Monkeyin’ around every Thursday at 8: 30! My lips! Jesus Christ! It tore off my lips!

And here’s Jenna with her gibbon-son.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Universal Television “And this autumn, 30 Rock is turning prime-time to PRIMATE day! AIIIEEE!

In Family Matters , Urkel aims up with a pet ape, which, according to Illinois law, means his home is classified as a research facility or zoo, making this only the 123 rd most ridiculous thing to happen on that show.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television “How about … ‘SHE’S MUCH PRETTIER THAN YOUR LAST GIRLFRIEND, STEVE.'” “It’s good … but what if instead, the ape goes insane and tears off all of their genitalia? Absolutely all of them? ” “WRITE IT. — Family Matters Writers Room, 1989

The Big Bang Theory , an abyss of diarrhea popular among the over-medicated, also has a pet monkey, and this one … smokes !? * laugh way *

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television * laugh way * B A Z I N G A * laugh track continues *

Besides the visiting monkey and the illegal pet monkey, there’s a stock plot even more dangerously wacky: the evil monkey. Here’s one from the worst episode of How I Met Your Mother , in which a monkey scoundrel rob Marshall at banana-point.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom 20 th Television Is that a handgun, or did you tear off somebodys genitals again?

Malcolm In The Middle has a knife-wielding helper monkey that tries to assassination Craig and Hal.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom 20 th Television So at least its somewhat realistic.

And in Community , the school is terrorized by Annie’s Boobs, a kleptomaniac monkey living in the vents.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Sony Pictures Television The first thing it stole? Our hearts. The second thing? Our genitalia.

Of all the overused tropes, this is the easiest to forgive, because monkey are the best. After all, if you had the opportunity to replace person at your job with a monkey, wouldn’t you do it? They’re silly, they look hilarious in people clothes, and demise by monkey is easily in the top 50 ways to die.

2

The Dumb Character Suddenly Becomes Smart

Every sitcom has a character who is helplessly, impossibly stupid. And somewhere in that grind of writing hundreds of episodes where the gang has to expend the night in a haunted house or inherits a race horse, some novelist will eventually suggest, “What if they became, like, smart? ” It’s like the plot to Lawnmower Man , which was a much more cyber version of the classic Daniel Keyes volume Flowers For Algernon .

It happens in an episode of The Simpsons when they find a crayon has been lodged in Homer’s brain for over 30 years. The moment they remove it, he becomes supremely intelligent but also sort of an asshole, so everybody starts hating him except Lisa. So he does the only thing that makes any sense: He has Moe hammer a crayon back up into his brain to get dumb again. To make this more soul-crushing, he does it right after he bonds with Lisa over the loneliness caused by their unrelatable intelligence. Yes, in a beloved, long-running comedy cartoon, a parent kills the only person who will ever understand his daughter so he can enjoy brew more. And it’s not the only time this smart-then-dumb-again trope get depressing.

In an episode of SpongeBob SquarePants , it’s discovered that Patrick has had a piece of coral acts as his brain for years, thereby making him the dullest water beast in all of Bikini Bottom. At first he’s happy with his newfound intelligence, but when it starts making his friend miserable, he yanks out his brain and sets the coral back in. The phase is, everyone detests the smart-alecky, so try to be dumber.

Futurama even did a version of this plotline wherein the monkey, Gunther, chooses his intelligence comes with too much responsibility, so he reduces his brain power voluntarily.

John Stuart Mill, the Utilitarian philosopher, famously asked: Is it better to be a dissatisfied Socrates or a perfectly fulfilled swine? It’s a complex problem worth discussing with the humans and pigs you know, but as you can see, cartoons vote pig every time.

1

Characters Always Get Stuck In Elevators( And Usually Assist in Childbirth )

If you ever find yourself in an elevator with a wacky neighbor, a monkey, or a pregnant female, get the fuck out. That elevator is going to get stuck between floors. A sitcom actor get trapped in an elevator with a crowning pregnant woman every eight minutes. Like in the Saved By The Bell episode “Earthquake, ” where Zack and friends hurl a newborn shower for Mr. Belding’s wife in order to avoid a physics test. Regrettably, they get in an elevator right as an earthquake strikes, and they end up turning the place into a maternity ward.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Universal Television “And that, children, was my wife’s gaping, placenta-squirting birth canal! “

This has been happening for generations. In the All In The Family episode “The Elevator Story, ” lovable racist Archie Bunker is trapped in an elevator with several nonwhites, and one of them starts pushing out a newborn. It’s uncomfortable.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Sony Pictures Television All of it is very uncomfortable.

A slight variant happened on WKRP In Cincinnati . In an episode called “Fire, ” a fire alarm sends the whole crew home early, except for Herb and the woman he sexually harasses on the prove for laughs, Jennifer. They end up trapped in the elevator together, and while she doesn’t have a newborn, Herb does confess to spreading rumors that he had sexuality with her. It’s less gooey than childbirth, but just as disgusting.

In “Porko II, ” an amazingly titled episode of Gimme A Break , Nell Carter hosts a session for her weight loss group, PORKO. Yes, PORKO. The head of the group shows up, and they all mock him for regaining the weight he lost. But oh no! The PORKO members soon find themselves stuck in an elevator that can’t handle all their porking weight. In the end, Nell talks their leader out of suicide, and everyone agrees to lose two pounds a week. That’s what TV used to be like, kids.

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Universal Television “Yes, this is Nell Carter, and YES, I am stuck in the elevator again! Oh no, you did NOT just laugh.”

In the Night Court episode “The Blizzard, ” lady-chasing sexuality addict Dan gets stuck in an elevator with a … a gay man !?

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television “Let’s have them sleep together? ” “Like, full penetration !? ” “That’s not what I entail, but perhaps? ” — Night Court Writers Room, 1984

And can you imagine getting stuck on an elevator with two sumo wrestlers !? The writers of Night Court could, in the episode “Earthquake! “

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television “Are we crazy? ” “Fuck you, talking glitch monster.” — Night Court Writers Room, 1985

OK wait, this can’t be right. In yet another episode of Night Court , “The Blues Of The Birth, ” Christine get trapped in an elevator with two men and goes into labor. It took them got a couple of tries, but Night Court , the industry leader in trapping performers in elevators, eventually delivered its first elevator baby!

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom Warner Bros. Television “Oh! You know where we should have Christine give birth? ” “Yes. Totally on the same page.” “Say it together on three. One. Two.” “ELEVATOR! ” “CAR DRIVEN BY MONKEY CRASHING INTO COURTR- oh, thats OK, too, I guess … — Night Court Writers Room, 1986

Joel B. Kirk resides in the San Francisco Bay Area and thinks the retro ‘8 0s music group The Midnight is too cool for terms . If Santa is real … is Elf on the Shelf ? If you loved this article and want more content like this, support our site with a visit to our Contribution Page. Please and thank you .

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom

6 Weird Things That Prove Up In Every Sitcom

6

Santa Is A Real, Magical Being … And No One Discovers That Amazing

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